“One of my children has diabetes, the other doesn’t. How do I make changes that the whole family can adopt so that my daughter doesn’t feel like she’s making our lives more difficult because of diabetes?” Fatima Richards.
Dear Fatima,
The emotions that parents deal with when a child is diagnosed with diabetes are the same as any serious medical condition. Confusion, shock, denial, sadness, anger, fear and guilt are some of these emotions.
Unfortunately, guilt is a feeling common to many family members, the patient as well as the parents. I believe that guilt is one of the most destructive negative emotions – it drains you so that you can’t focus on more important things.
Getting the whole family to deal with these feelings openly at the time of diagnosis helps with long term adjustment. As you all learn to live with diabetes, you will become more used to it and find ways to fit it into your life more naturally. Fitting diabetes care into as normal a life as possible is the major goal.
Remember, too, that if all family members have a positive attitude, life with diabetes will be much easier. One day at a time is a good option!
How to help the whole family adjust to diabetes:
- Keep your family routine as close to the previous ‘normal’ as possible.
- Whenever possible, fit diabetes care around your child’s lifestyle, rather than her life revolving around diabetes.
- Remember, children with diabetes are children first. Their diabetes should not define who they are.
- Explain any changes that are made because of diabetes to everyone in the family.
- Remember that nobody is being punished because of the diabetes. Everyone is just going to follow a healthier lifestyle. And this is a good thing.
– Jeannie Berg, Diabetes Educator
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